June 8th
I‘m sorry that I wasted almost two month with almost nothing achieved. Even the daily target of reviewing 10 pages of math was failed as well. But since the moment when CS openday annouced, I felt an energy is pushing - the energy of a BIG FAILURE. So far I repick my math book and try my best to review 20 pages per day. That's the saying, today's laziness is tomorrow's exhaustion. I know, I know.
Yesterday, the SME held an Experience Sharing of Exam. Our teacher poured cold water on us and spoke bluntly about the past results.
Honestly, I was afraid of the same failure, and can't help thinking what can I do if it turns out that I am not capable of being a graduate student.
You don't have to become graduate student at all if you just want to make money. Undergratuates can usually earn about more than 10k, which is indeed a considerable number.
But why the Fintech student who first become a NJU graduate student by joining the exam cannot be me?
Two of my friends make it to go on to graduate studies this year.
One is a girl who have worked in a senior high school for 2 years and finally fed up with the job. She is not good on English, and just get a 48, which is below the basic line of most schools. But she successfully did it anyway.
Another one is one of my close friends - we used to be that, before he goes beyond me in every aspects - he has get the qualification as early as 39 days ago. But he annouced this good news only in wechat, making me not aware of that until someone told me in hours ago. While he is relaxing and ready for the next one year, I am still have 196 days of hard work to go.
Just what i mentioned - today's laziness is tomorrow's exhaustion.
I say to myself...
You can get a job even everything is failed. Right? So just keep it up. I believe in you.
See you August 20th, the deadline when you have to decide to keep or join the autumn army of looking for jobs.